Astronomy

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Coping With It All  PV 

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Katrina found herself about to knock at the door to the Astronomy classroom. The second year truly had no clue why she was coming in. It wasn't like she really knew the Professor more than class and the one time where she had gotten a warning and hardly escaped without detention. But there was something about Professor Karr that had Katrina wanting to reach out, to talk, maybe just to simply ask for help. She was the only Professor that Katrina had said anything to after all.

Katrina twisted the handle and pushed the door open. The cold air of the classroom and the feeling of floating in space took her breath away for a second. It did every time she was in the room. The magical barriers of the room made it seem like there were no walls, the night sky seeming so close you could touch it.

Mustering up her courage Katrina spoke out, "Professor Karr?" A beat of silence where she tried to form the words, "Can I talk to you?" Doubt flooded through her mind. The Professor probably had tons of work to do or classes to plan. She probably didn't have time to talk to one student with a mess of emotions that she couldn't handle. Katrina bit her lip-- hard-- fighting the urge to tuck her hair behind her ear.

Katrina was only a 12-year-old, but she had too much to handle. Last year, she had received a note telling her that her parents, brother, and childhood home had gone up in flames. At their funeral, her remaining family had stated that they didn't want her. Friendless and too shy to talk to anyone, Katrina had hardly made it through her first year. Since she had nowhere to go, the girl had to cope with being at the school all summer. Her second year had been chaotic. From the horrors of the Masked Ball to sneaking away during winter break, she had been on a roller coaster of emotions. Finally, after the night which she refused to think about --lest she suffer another panic attack-- the Blossomball, she had realized that she couldn't handle it anymore by herself.

Katrina snapped out of her thoughts, aware that she probably looked like she was a movie character put on pause. She shifted her weight, forcing herself to not be trapped by her past. The lioness felt her hands begin to shake and she stuffed them in her pockets. Simply thinking about everything was putting her on the edge of another panic attack. She took a breath and looked around the room again.

The roller coasters of emotions taking it's toll on her. Katrina knew everything was too much. She would have to somehow say all of it out loud without succumbing to a panic attacks, it was going to be a tough evening. But it was time to ask for help.
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@Kateri Karr

>Stats: Sta 9, Evas 8, Str 3, Wis 11, ArcP 9, Acc 5<
>Healing Sage | Perfectionist | Charmer || Leader of SHC| Owner of The Kat Shop<

Coping With It All  PV 

· • —– ٠ ▹◃ ٠ —– • ·
@Katrina Walker
Another busy evening, though Kateri had in all honesty decided to focus on putting her energy elsewhere. Fixing some of the cushions she used for class. Of course most of the students picked at the sides whether from nerves or not. Regardless it had started to catch the young woman's eye that some of the beading was pulling on a handful, some of which the embroidered patterns had been tugged on making the threads coming loose. So there she sat in the middle of the classroom, a heap of cushions surrounding her and sewing kit to one side. Humming a gentle tune to herself as she worked, spare pin tucked neatly between her lips, Kateri had completely missed the knock at the door to the tower.

Looping another bit of orange thread and pulling it into a knot at the end of what appeared to be a vine on the trip of the cushion laying half in her lap, a small voice drew the professor's attention away from the task.

"Erh!" Biting onto the pin between her lips to keep it from falling, Kateri noticed a familiar face staring in her direction. Katrina Walker. She had been a good student in class and even having caught her up in the tower, there was something about the young lion that Kateri admired. Taking the pin from her mouth and sticking it back into the pincushion tied around her wrist, Kateri gave Katrina a warm smile. She didn't have to know the girl well enough to feel the tense cloud that had formed a stagnant, almost murky aura around Katrina. "I'm happy to see you. Come join me!" Softly she patted her free hand on a large cushion next to her. Kateri could only imagine what the young cub was going through after the events of the Blossom Ball. Having rushed there herself with her colleagues to help set things right, she had seen the look on the faces of many of the students in attendance. Some of which still seemed extremely unsettled. Understandably so... Kateri only hoped she could offer some solace to the girl and if anything a quiet space for her to escape to when she needed.



"Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented."-Elie Wiesel

Coping With It All  PV 

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Katrina took a step forward and heard a sound from one side of the room. Looking over, she saw that the Professor was on the ground sewing some of the pillows? At least, that's what it seemed like from the distance. Katrina took a few steps forward, watching as Professor Karr stuck a pin in a pincushion on her wrist and giving a feeble smile back at her.

The second-year had a bad tendency to put on a mask whenever she was around most people. To those paying much attention, it would seem like her emotions just changed with the flip of a switch. Her mouth would curl into a smile, her eyes seeming to clear, attention looking like it was on whomever was speaking to her. But the truth was, the emotion they saw was just a mask hiding the hurt or pain or distraction or sadness really going on in her head. But with the Professor, Katrina didn't even have the energy to any of that.

Her clothes weren't wrinkled, but they certainly weren't as nicely pressed as they were when she was in a good mood. Her hair was brushed, but it lacked it's usual shine. Her eyes were dull and tired, she avoided sleep as nightmares were a daily occurrence. But the most distinguishing thing was the fact that she never held still, she was always moving and doing things, often multiple things at a time. There was a sort of innate fear that if she held still too long, the reality of everything would come crashing down and squish her under the weight.

Professor Karr offered Katrina to join her and the Gryffindor obliged, taking a seat on the pillow next to her. From this close, Katrina could see that she was working on patching up the holes in them and tucking in the threads that had come loose. She remembered a few other students picking at them and was sort of surprised how much damage they had wreaked on the poor cushions.

Katrina bit her lip. She wanted to talk, to vent, to get it all out. But, she didn't know where in the world to start. As far as she knew, none of the professors knew she was an orphan. Should she start there? Should she start with how hard it had been to fit in? Should she start with the balls or the fears she has? Start with something easy like favorite class or come up with some sort of Astronomy related question?

"You know, my parents and brother used to go over to a house that my grandparents used to own back in the States during the summer. Three times a summer, my dad would take me out camping. Not my brother, not my mom-- just me and my dad. We would pack our bags and hike up a trail near the house. We'd find a spot that was flat enough for our tents and set them up. But we would leave all of the windows down and not put the rain shield up so we could just see the stars. We'd sit there for hours making up our own constellations and stories to go along with them. It was the best part of summer," Katrina bit her lip again, this time to keep from crying. At least she got enough out. The Professor would easily piece together the muggleborn history and might even notice that she said the whole thing in past tense. The memory was one she visited often, the last one of her dad and her happy and content.
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@Kateri Karr

>Stats: Sta 9, Evas 8, Str 3, Wis 11, ArcP 9, Acc 5<
>Healing Sage | Perfectionist | Charmer || Leader of SHC| Owner of The Kat Shop<

Coping With It All  PV 

· • —– ٠ ▹◃ ٠ —– • ·
@Katrina Walker
Waiting for the girl to take a seat before she placed a new thread on her needle. Kateri knew eventually she may open up whether now or later. Either way it had to be on her own time and Kat would not push the young lion cub. By the looks of things the poor thing already had quite a lot on her mind. Placing a knot in the end of the bright pink thread, Kat began stitching at one of the floral parts of the embroidery. Finally Katrina's voice broke from her lips, Kateri nodding as she followed the girl's story.

"That sounds like a lovely memory to keep." Leaning back to stretch out her shoulders, Kateri continued looping thread into the pillow to add to the flower hanging onto the edge of the cushion. Something in the girl's voice conveyed a deeper knowledge to be gleaned from the memory. Working a little more slowly on the embroidery, Kateri turned and smiled at the girl. She knew all too well it was a hard thing to share such a private memory with someone else. Almost as if you were giving it up, giving it away, afraid that if you tell someone else it might never return to you. "What sort of stories did the two of you create together?" Clearly there was more but Kat did not want to push. If anything just opening the door for Katrina would let her speak whatever she needed, whenever she chose.


"Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented."-Elie Wiesel

Coping With It All  PV 

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It was relieving in and of itself just to talk to the Professor. Katrina already felt like she could say whatever she wanted. Professor Karr just had something that was helping Katrina to talk. It even surprised the young lioness that she was talking, let alone planning on saying everything. The words just seemed to come out before her mind fully wrapped around what she was even saying. Like her words had a mind of their own.

To answer the Professor's question, Katrina paused-- her mind played through dozens of tails and stories, "All kinds. They usually had dragons of some sort. I always found a way to get those into my tails. Even before I knew magic was even possible, they had a special place in my imagination." Katrina paused for a beat, inhaling, "But I won't be able to do that again. My dad-- and family..." The Gryffindor felt herself tense before letting the honesty spill out in a complicated mess, "There was a fire last March. A house fire. I-- received my first ever letter at Hogwarts. My parents and my brother had perished. I lost everything," The 12-year-old's words echoed in her head. Memories bursting to the surface of her mind, overwhelming her for a few seconds. Her words were jumbled and hurried, almost like if she said it fast enough, it would just go away.

Katrina felt the tears well up in her eyes and she closed them and wiped away the tears, embarrassed to be crying-- again, "And m-my family told me at the funeral that they did-didn't want me. They said-- they said I was evil. They called me a spoiled brat and evil and a creep and... they were the only thing I had left," Katrina was crying now. The girl was surprising herself with the honesty. This was the first time she had ever said those things out loud. The memory of that horrid day plagued her nightmares. It had been the final blow to her.

Katrina wiped the tears away, somehow regaining her dignity enough to not be bawling. She slowed her breathing, gritting her teeth with annoyance at herself. This time her voice was quiet and slow, pain intertwined with her words, "I didn't make any friends my first year. No one knew me or what had happened to me. And when they found out this year, they only spread rumors. There's only three people in the entire school that know and actually care,"

Honesty was spilling out. It was like she had held it all in and suppressed it for so long that she couldn't contain it. She had turned on the faucet and now it was stuck wide open, the truth gushing through. How long had she kept everything to herself, not wanting the pity or to make anyone else feel bad? Katrina was embarrassed to spring into the truth so fast, but at this point, there was little she could do to stop it.
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@Kateri Karr

>Stats: Sta 9, Evas 8, Str 3, Wis 11, ArcP 9, Acc 5<
>Healing Sage | Perfectionist | Charmer || Leader of SHC| Owner of The Kat Shop<

Coping With It All  PV 

· • —– ٠ ▹◃ ٠ —– • ·
@Katrina Walker
A smile lingered on the woman's lips as the girl spoke of the stories she had created. There were points in the young cub's voice that would hitch and give way to the emotions that had been clearly tormenting the poor girl.

Finally it spilled forth along with a swell of tears. A fire and a terrible tragedy. Loss. A twinge squeezed at the woman's chest and pulled a breath from her lungs. Rising from her seat, Kateri crossed the room and leaned to grab a handkerchief from the pocket of her jacket. Returning to Katrina she handed the small square of red fabric to the girl.

"I am deeply sorry." Brown eyes trailed over the girl's tear stained face. How horrible for her family to not take her in. As close as Kateri was to her family she was certainly aware not everyone had that experience in life. It always broke her heart especially to hear it from someone so young. Leaving a small space between the two of them the professor let her hands sink into her lap as she lowered herself back into her seat. She listened closely about Katrina's first year here and how things had been for her. When she paused only then did Kateri speak up, careful not to cut the Gryffindor off.

"I won't pretend to know what you are going through but I thank you for trusting me with such a personal part of you." It must have taken some serious nerve for her to finally open up. If Katrina had been carrying this around for this long it was no wonder that the girl had been coming to the tower to think and been so upset the other night. She had looked about to burst before Kateri had stumbled upon the two girls. It all made sense now. Not that the woman had wanted it to be due to something like this. Adjusting her position and scooting closer, Kateri held her left arm out and waved the other, motioning Katrina to sit closer should she wish. She was unsure how else to comfort the girl. Words would only go so far and in all honesty it appeared as if the girl could use a more comforting approach. Should Katrina accept the offer, Kateri would drape her arm around the girl's shoulder lightly and give her a squeeze of reassurance. Should the girl recoil, Kateri would respect the reaction and give her a continued amount of space but either way continue her support through conversation.

"I'm sure more here care about than you know." Kateri drew in a breath and held it for a moment before letting it go slowly. "Unfortunately...well, sometimes family is not always those you were born alongside. You're a very bright student and though you may not be able to see it, you have a strength that others do not possess." Kateri offered a warm smile, her eyes softened as she hoped one day the young lion cub would see herself the way others do. "You were put into Gryffindor for a reason, even the Sorting Hat could see it from the very start. All that you have accomplished here in such a short time... I'm sure your parents are looking down at you with pride in their heart." Kateri knew all too well the sting of loss and how with a cut this deep often words were not enough. Sometimes what it took was time. Time to heal and having opened up Kateri knew that Katrina would be able to start that journey.


"Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented."-Elie Wiesel

Coping With It All  PV 

At Katrina's burst of suppressed emotions, Professor Karr offered her a handkerchief. Katrina accepted it and rubbed the tears away that were rolling down her face. The Professor offered words of encouragement and Katrina let them wash over her, although it didn't do much at first. She played with the red fabric of the handkerchief, eyes watching as her fingers played with the hem of it.

The Professor gestured her closer and Katrina did so, tensing slightly as she put her arm around her. It had been a long time since someone had shown physical affection. Hugs weren't a big thing with her family and she hadn't made enough close friends for it to be normal.

As Professor Karr went on, Katrina found that her tears had stopped and that instead there was an aching for what she couldn't have. An aching to turn back time and relive the memories that were already fading too fast for her to handle. She made a comment about Katrina being strong and the second year turned her head down, she didn't feel all that strong right now. She had made promises to herself to not cry and to get over it, but her inward vows had all disintegrated the first time she let herself feel.

Katrina didn't know why the Sorting hat had put her in Gryffindor. Professor Karr said it like it was obvious that she belonged in the house of the brave, like she could see it. Katrina didn't belong in any of the houses. She wasn't self-benefitting like Slytherins, or open and caring like the Hufflepuffs, she could be wise enough for Ravenclaw, but she had a hunch she wouldn't belong there either. Was there really a home for her here?

"How are you so sure that I belong?" Katrina's usually certain voice was failing her, making her question seem childish and insignificant.

"I try to protect and I try to help others and all that ever happens is me returning to my dorm feeling defeated and unnoticed. That's the whole reason I went to the," Katrina's voice failed again, memories surging and threatening to overwhelm her with another panic attack, "Blossomball. I didn't want to go. I just didn't want to wake up the next morning with students in the hospital wing and me having done nothing to help them. At least I could do that much, nobody I know was hurt. Except myself," This was the first time Katrina had really talked about that night. About why she had gone and the fact that it was only to protect the defenseless.

She felt her hand on her arm where the golf ball sized scar rested. Without realizing it, she had pulled up the sleeve of the robe to reveal the mark. It had healed mostly, but magic couldn't fix everything. There was the small scar on her ear, but that one had faded mostly. The marks were a constant reminder that she needed to take care of everyone, even if they didn't know her.
@Kateri Karr

>Stats: Sta 9, Evas 8, Str 3, Wis 11, ArcP 9, Acc 5<
>Healing Sage | Perfectionist | Charmer || Leader of SHC| Owner of The Kat Shop<