mirrorball PV A. Lewis Ended

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The events from the day before were still bothering Allie. She had been on her way to classes when she saw an older girl attack another girl. It had frightened her a little. Well, okay, a lot more than a little. When she first arrived at Hogwarts, she would have never guessed something like this would happen - on her first day of classes no less! She tried to clear these thoughts out of her mind as she pushed open the doors to the Great Hall and stepped inside.

The large room was bustling with students and staff as usual, and most tables were already full of friends chatting away about things. Allie hadn't met very many people that she would be comfortable sitting with so far, and one glance around the Great Hall told her none of the people she had met were there anyway. Or they weren't totally visible to her at least. Biting her lip, the first year made herself walk farther in, and she heard the doors swing shut behind her with a dull thump.

Right as Allie gathered her courage to step up to one of the tables near her and introduce herself to the other students that were sitting there already, a figure sitting hunched over a table in the corner caught her eye and she pressed onward towards it. Upon walking a little closer, Allie could see that there was only one other person sitting there, and so she walked right up to them, and opened her mouth to ask if she could sit there with them. That's when she realized who it was. The girl who had attacked another the day before.

"Oh! I, um. . ." she never stammered. . . Reaching up for a strand of her hair to twirl around her finger, a nervous habit, Allie took a small, nervous step back. She knew why she was afraid, but didn't want to admit it, even to herself. It seemed like a silly reason. . . Glancing back at the older girl, Allie noticed that she didn't seem like she was okay. . . "Are you alright?" she couldn't help but ask.

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@Allie Lewis

Continuing to ice her eye, Ana poked listlessly at her food. To anyone who knew her, this was a clear sign that something was very wrong. Anastasia was a vivacious person, constantly talking and moving and doing things as quickly as she could. Right now, she wasn't doing anything other than repeatedly stab a piece of potato. Other than her sudden outburst the previous afternoon and similar explosions at friends who were trying to ask what was wrong, she had been like this since July. It was like she was stuck moving through water that nobody else could even see.

She was startled from her thoughts by the arrival of a younger girl. First-year, by the look of her, not that Ana particularly cared. At first, Ana ignored the girl, but then it became clear that the girl was trying to speak to her. Lovely. What was it about her prickly demeanor, literal assault of other students, and general meanness that made her such a magnet for random chatty little first years to seek out? One would have thought that any sane person would have steered away from her, but lately, it would have seemed like a neon billboard would have been less effective at drawing unwanted attention.

Ana sighed when the girl asked if she was alright. No, she clearly wasn't, so why ask? What gave this girl the right to know anything, anything at all, about Anastasia's mental and emotional state? "Just peachy," she said, her tone lackluster, glancing up and meeting the younger girl's eyes. She glanced away and went back to the assault of her potato, expecting the girl to wander away now that it was clear Ana was completely disinterested in this conversation. After a few moments when that hadn't happened, she looked back up and arched an eyebrow. That small expression made her look far more like her old self, as though she was in the middle of mocking someone's unfortunate hair or outfit choices. "Well, is there something else?"

As she waited for the other girl's reply, she sipped at her coffee and rested her chin lazily on her fist. Her dark eyes peered at the girl so intently that if she had had her wand out, there might be a concern she was trying to practice wandless magic.

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The older girl sighed heavily, and Allie bit her lip as she waited for her answer. When it came, in a very sarcastic tone, Allie sighed as well. She should've realized this girl wouldn't give her an actual answer. She stood there for a few seconds, watching as the other student started stabbing at her potato, which was already riddled with holes as if she had been at it for a while.

"Well, is there something else?" The question startled Allie and she blushed slightly. She hadn't even realized the girl had looked back up at her. Still, she was determined - and there was really no where else to sit.

"Is it alright if I sit here?" she asked, but then wanted to take it back, knowing now that she would get another sarcastic reply. "The other tables are all crowded, and I just wanted a little quiet. . ." she paused. Explaining why she was here probably wouldn't do anything to help her case, but she continued. "I promise not to bother you?" The last part came out as a question and Allie waited for an answer.

To be honest, if it had been anyone else sitting here, she probably would have just gotten up and walked away, but although she was still a little frightened of the older student, she was also curious. And that curiosity tended to get the better of her a lot - just like it was doing now. Allie wanted to know what had made the girl so upset that she had launched herself at another student the day before. Recalling the memories of the encounter, she didn't think the other girl had done anything to provoke such actions. Really, what could she have done that would make that happen?

Glancing at the girl in front of her, Allie began to get a little worried. But there wasn't any way to back out of this now. . .

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@Allie Lewis

What ever happened to first years being respectfully scared of older years? One would have thought that attacking a random person in the hall in addition to the insane rumors about her family and her overall demeanor would have ensured that absolutely nobody who didn't know her would approach her. That was definitely not the case and Ana was slightly baffled. She didn't have the energy or bandwidth to ponder why, so she would suffice with being irritated.

The thing that had baffled her most was how entitled to her emotions everyone else felt. She had gotten some idea of this last spring when she had been set on fire and there had been rumors flying about that, with people acting as though she somehow owed them her emotions and an explanation. Why did nobody seem to get that what she was going through was her business and nobody else's? She didn't know what she was going through, and even if she did, nobody else deserved to know.

"Whatever, just sit down if you're going to," Ana said in response to the girl's request to join her. If she wanted quiet, the Great Hall was one of the worst places to go for that, second only to the Gryffindor Common Room. Odds were this girl wanted to stare at her like Ana was some caged zoo animal. Did people really have nothing better to do? Just about everyone she'd encountered since the previous afternoon had either whispered something about the rumors or stared at her. Were their own lives really that dull that they thought her life was for them to watch like a muggle TV show?

Anyway, it wasn't like fights were half as rare as the professors would have liked them to be. Locking several hundred witches and wizards ranging from age eleven to eighteen in one castle wasn't exactly a recipe for peace and harmony. There was bound to be conflict from time to time, which was why there was a hospital wing. All things considered, tackling and hitting someone in the hall was fairly par for the course, and not even one of the worst or most dangerous things that had happened at the school that year.

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The girl sitting in front of Allie looked slightly confused about something - probably why Allie was sticking around to "bother" her more. And yet, she still consented to letting Allie sit with her. . . hopefully a good sign. "Thank you," the first year said as she sat down across from the older girl. "I'm Allie." Not really expecting an answer, she let her thoughts wander as she filled her plate with all different types of foods.

The subdued student in front of her didn't seem anything like the angry girl that had attacked another student the day before. It was almost as if she had a completely separate personality. Of course, there were a few things about the girl's personality and posture that were similar, but. . . Not able to help herself, Allie looked up from her plate to examine the girl a little better. Soon realizing that it was quite rude, she glanced back down and kept eating. The silence was overwhelming.

After a little while, Allie couldn't stand the silence anymore and had to say something. "You're the girl - " Clamping her mouth shut tightly, Allie prayed that the girl wouldn't guess what she had been about to ask. This was probably the worst time she could bring up the fight in the hall from the day before. The girl sitting across from her was already in a bad enough mood it seemed. . . and who knows what she would do if Allie brought the previous day up.

She only opened her mouth after she figured out something to say that (hopefully) wouldn't trigger any outburst from the older girl. "What year are you in?" Obviously the other student was older than Allie, probably by a few years at least, but she couldn't guess which one. Maybe a fourth year? Twirling a strand of her long brown hair that had come loose from her neat braid, Allie waited for an answer.

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@Allie Lewis

Another sigh escaped Ana's lips as the girl decided to sit. She had half hoped that the girl didn't actually want to sit there and that she would just wander away. She introduced herself, which Ana graced with an eyebrow arch before returning to her attack on the potato. She probably already knew Ana's name and anyway, exchanging names seemed to imply a willingness to converse that Ana really didn't want to imply.

She took another swallow of coffee before taking a bit of her massacred potato. How was it that she was so desperately lonely yet at the same time couldn't stand being around the majority of her schoolmates? It seemed to be a rather cruel irony to the Gryffindor. She had never felt more alone, but any time she was around other people, she felt suffocated. It wasn't just strangers either, it was her friends. Even if they meant well, talking to them felt smothering.

Allie began to ask a question then quickly clamped her mouth shut. This warranted a death glare from the third year. "The girl who what?" she said, her tone biting and daring the girl to reply. It wasn't half as intense as her normal threatening tone, but that didn't mean it wasn't still terrifying. "The girl who set people on fire last year? Or the girl who attacked someone in the hall yesterday. Because yes, those were both me." She didn't sound particularly proud of those actions, nor particularly ashamed. She was just stating something that had happened. Both of these were probably common knowledge at this point, and she knew there were far worse rumors about her.

"Third year," Ana said tersely. God, what was it that made people feel so comfortable to approach her and demand to know everything about her? One would think the reputation for violence and bullying coupled with the leather jacket and death glares would have made avoiding her the common practice, but it was just the opposite. "And you're clearly a first year." She said the words first year as though it was some terrible insult. Honestly, it rather was when she contemplated her own time as a first-year and the things she had considered important. It also had to do with the fact that Ana was of a high enough year that she was now allowed to have complete and utter blatant dislike for first years. Second years doing so was rather silly, seeing as they had been first years a few months ago, but third years were generally more mature and experienced. In Ana's mind, anyway.

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Even after quickly trying to change the subject, Allie knew from the glare she received that the older girl had guessed what she had been about to say - or at least had a suspicion. Either way, the look Allie was getting made her nervous for what was about to come, and she pressed her lips together, waiting for an outburst.

"The girl who what? The girl who set people on fire last year? Or the girl who attacked someone in the hall yesterday. Because yes, those were both me." The poor first year shut her eyes while the other student was fuming, wishing that she hadn't decided to sit here after all. When there was a beat of silence, she finally opened her eyes again but made sure to look away at the ground.

"I - I'm sorry." she said, in a small voice. "I didn't mean to upset you. I just. . ." Allie had thought, when first coming to Hogwarts, that everything would be absolutely perfect. Of course, it was silly. She realized that now. But, she had really hoped. . . Peeking back up for a brief moment, Allie caught the other girl's words, even though they hadn't been very loud, and weren't in the friendliest tone of voice. It gave her a little hope, at least, but Allie still wasn't sure if she was ready to reply yet. She waited for a few seconds, then sighed and looked up to face the girl, ready.

"Why are you so. . ." she couldn't come up with the right word, so she just continued. "I mean, all I did was ask one question, and all of a sudden you snap out at me!" Taking a deep breath before she continued, the first year kept her gaze up, not letting it waver even once. "I am sorry if I'm bothering you, but if you really don't want me here, you can just tell me. There's no need to yell." Her voice wasn't as calm as she wanted it to be, showing that she was more afraid than she wanted to admit, and yet, she still didn't look down. "Okay?" she asked, her voice shaking a little more.

It took a few more seconds for the full reality of what she'd done sank in, and Allie bit her lip hard, trying to distract herself. It didn't work. She really couldn't believe she'd just stood up for herself like that - to a third year no less! Waiting for the other girl to reply, she sat looking down at the table.

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@Allie Lewis

Anastasia pressed her fingers to her temple
after she finished talking. The younger girl seemed taken aback, which didn't make sense. She had purposely brought up what was clearly a sore subject for Ana, how had she expected Ana to react? God, it was like other students these days just didn't see each other as an actual person. It was like they all expected to be able to poke at Ana and then were surprised when she snapped at them. If Ana had attacked someone over something, it was fairly safe to assume that it was a sensitive topic. You didn't have to be a genius to put those together.

She rolled her eyes slightly when the girl said she didn't mean to upset Ana. Well, then what had she meant to do? "Trust me, that wasn't me snapping at you, you would know if it was," Ana said, the volume of her voice never rising. She wasn't a yeller, having grown up in a house where there was always the possibility of someone listening in. When Ana was actually angry, her voice would become lower and gravelly. However, that wasn't happening here. Ana was neither yelling nor exhibiting any outward signs of anger. Mostly because she didn't have the energy to get into a pointless fight with an overly self-important first year.

Based on how the first year's voice wavered, she was more than a little afraid of Ana. With good reason, probably, as Ana even without all the black leather and fistfights was vindictive and impulsive at best. Ana supposed it was somewhat laudable that the girl did what she perceived as confronting someone volatile and dangerous, but again, she really didn't have the energy to be impressed one way or another. "Are you done?" she asked calmly as the girl's word vomit seemed to take a break. "You said that you weren't going to bother me, then proceeded to ask about something that's clearly not a subject I particularly want to discuss with a stranger. You may stay if you like, but continue to poke your nose where it doesn't belong and I can guarantee you'll see me as you called it "snap out at you".

People who knew Ana well would be mildly concerned for the explosive Gryffindor since she would generally instantly banish someone who had been that nosy. Still, the girl had endeared herself ever so slightly to Ana, so she wouldn't make her leave just yet. "So, you have a name, I imagine?" she said expectantly.

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Allie couldn't stop herself from raising her eyebrows when the Gryffindor told her that she hadn't been snapping at her. If that hadn't been snapping. . . Allie shuddered just to think of what might have happened if she had said anything more about the fight yesterday. The problem was, Allie couldn't even say very much back to the girl, no matter how much she wanted to. She knew anything and most likely everything she said would be used against her in the end. She was helpless against whatever the girl wanted to say to her.

"Yes, I'm done," she told the girl once she had stopped talking. "And I know saying I'm sorry won't do anything, but I just wanted to say that I really am. I wasn't thinking when I said that." She wanted to take back the words, knowing they would result in some sarcastic comment, but that was a power she didn't have. If she did, none of this would have happened. . .

When prompted to tell her name, Allie resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She had already told this girl her name, but she had clearly not been listening very well. . . "I'm Allie," she said once more, making sure that the annoyance she felt didn't seep into her words. "Your name is. . ."

During the fight the previous day, Allie couldn't remember anyone mentioning the older student's name, she had been too busy trying to hold her back. The things she did remember though, were not the type of memories you wanted to have playing in your mind throughout the day. Screaming, curse words, blood. . . Allie shivered and pushed those thoughts away. She hoped the discomfort - and fear - she felt couldn't be seen on her face. If they could, she hoped the other student would be kind enough to not use it against her for once.

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